Losing Weight With Friends: Why Support Seems to Help

Trying to change your habits can feel lonely, especially when it seems like everyone else eats whatever they like. A classic study from the late 1990s looked at what happened when people tried to lose weight together instead of alone. Its results are worth knowing, along with what they do and do not prove. This is general education, not medical advice or therapy.

The study

In 1999, Rena Wing and Robert Jeffery published a study in the Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology. It included 166 adults. Some signed up alone, and others signed up as a group of four with friends or family members. Everyone took part in a four-month behavioral weight-loss program, and half were randomly assigned to get extra social support strategies, such as team activities and ways to encourage each other.

What they found

• People who joined with friends were more likely to finish. About 95 percent of those recruited with friends and given the support strategies completed the program, compared with about 76 percent of those who joined alone and received the standard program.
• They were more likely to keep the weight off. At the follow-up six months after treatment ended, about 66 percent of the with-friends, extra-support group had fully maintained their weight loss, compared with about 24 percent of those who joined alone with standard treatment.
• They lost more weight during treatment and at follow-up. The advantage held at the 10-month mark.

Why a friend might help

• Accountability. Knowing someone will ask how it went can nudge you to stick with a plan.
• Shared effort. Cooking and walking are easier when you do not have to make the plan alone.
• Encouragement on hard days. Support can be as simple as a text.
• Less friction at home. If the people you live with are on board, there are fewer temptations in the kitchen.

Keep the limits in mind

• The study is from 1999. Weight-loss programs and habits have changed since then.
• It was a structured program. The support was part of a package, and the study cannot separate friends from the strategies they used.
• People who sign up with friends may differ. They may have more social resources to begin with.
• Not everyone has a buddy or wants one. That is fine, and there are other sources of support.

Ways to find support that fits

• Ask one person. A friend, partner or coworker who wants to walk after lunch is a start.
• Pick a shared activity, not just a shared goal. Walking, cooking and trying a class are easier than comparing numbers.
• Be clear about what helps. Tell people whether you want encouragement, company or to be left alone about food.
• Look beyond family. Community classes, walking groups and local clubs can make it social.
• Talk to a professional if it feels heavy. A licensed clinician or dietitian can offer support, especially if food or weight causes distress.

When support goes wrong

Support should feel supportive. Comments about your body, food policing and competition can add pressure. Our guide to weight stigma explains why shame tends to backfire. If someone’s help does not feel helpful, it is reasonable to say so.

Where to go next

• Small steps make it easier to start together. See our guide to how long a habit takes.
• If stress is part of the picture, read our stress eating guide.

The takeaway

You do not have to do this alone, and the research suggests that company may make it easier to stay with a plan. The best support is the kind you choose: a walking partner, a friend who cooks with you, or simply someone who asks how it is going.

Sources

• Wing RR, Jeffery RW. Benefits of recruiting participants with friends and increasing social support for weight loss and maintenance. Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology, 1999;67(1):132-138.